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Every morning before rising, and every evening on getting into bed, shut your eyes and repeat several times this little phrase: “Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better.” So wrote Dr. Emile Coué in his book entitled Self-mastery Through Conscious Auto-suggestion.

You may wonder why I would quote Dr. Coué. I will tell you that these words introduce the first chapter of a book that I came upon in a quite unusual way.

Recently, my 28-year-old daughter, Kellie, drove up for a visit. As she is a teacher, her free time is quite limited. I had been looking forward to spending time with her, so off we went, just the two of us. A couple of hours of shopping and for me the opportunity to release some of the stress I had accumulated as a regular routine of my daily responsibilities.

I am the mother of five, ages 31 to 9. My 12-year-old daughter is on the autism spectrum. She is on the higher-functioning end of the spectrum, however, suffers sensory integration issues, anxiety and depression, has difficulty processing information and shares the many pieces of the puzzle that bind autistic children together.

I have been homeschooling Katie, along with her 9-year-old brother, Jamie, whom we adopted from Vietnam as a baby. I had found that Katie was better able to learn in the home environment with Rudolf Steiner’s Waldorf method. While I have had great success with Katie’s educational progress, I go into my own sensory overload being home 24/7, teaching, maintaining our household and managing the ups and downs, which are a part of every autistic child’s day.

This day was different. Kellie and I stopped into Pinkberry for a “swirly goodness” treat, and then headed off to the shops. Nothing out of the ordinary, really… or so I thought. How was I to know that by the end of the afternoon I would experience a life-altering event?

Outings are never ordinary for me. Katie is unable to be separated without hearing my voice on the cell phone every ten minutes or so. The calls are always the same.

“Mommy, when are you coming home? How many minutes? I miss you.” As much as I know the importance of these calls to Katie, I can’t help but feel that I have no escape to just be ‘me’. Free from the usual routine and worries, free to have a little fun with someone who isn’t in constant need, who won’t go into meltdown. Anyone who has had the joy of riding in the car alone to the market, buying a carton of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream and then experiencing heaven on earth while devouring the ice cream in the quiet space of the car, knows exactly what I mean.

I reassured Katie that we would be home by 5:00 and decided to pick-up something simple for dinner. Pizza was the choice and Kellie suggested “The best pizza in town”, so we headed to the pizza restaurant, Mesa Pizza, my ‘day out’ coming to an end, the sinking feeling settling in, and the home routine just around the bend.

I had called ahead for the pizza and upon arrival we headed to the counter. I had not been to this particular restaurant before and noted the few patrons eating at tables while Kellie and I stood chatting and waiting for the pizza to be ready.

We were in the restaurant approximately ten minutes when the gentleman behind the counter handed me a book and said, “This book is being gifted to you by the author. He is sitting at the table, there (he pointed to a table behind me) and he wants you to have this book. He will autograph it personally for you.”

I didn’t know what to say. Why me? I looked at the book, thanked him and walked to the elderly man sitting at a small table.

I held out my hand, “Thank you so much for the book. I am so looking forward to reading it but I don’t want to interrupt your meal.” The young man sitting with him said to give the author the book to sign. He appeared to be in his 80’s, quite distinguished. He smiled and asked my name. He opened the book and signed it to me and added, “working for happiness”.

I again thanked him, turned and joined my daughter at a nearby table where we awaited our order.

I looked at Kellie, and then read the title of the book. “Most of All They Taught Me Happiness” by Dr. Robert Muller. I flipped the book over to read about this kind man who had gifted this stranger his book.

Dr. Muller was raised In France, joined the French Resistance in WWII, was captured by the Nazis and devoted 40 years of his life to the United Nations. He is the former Assistant Secretary General to the United Nations. I went on to read enthusiastic comments about the book by Wayne Dyer, Neale Donald Walsch and Deepak Chopra.

As I gathered our order, I again thanked him. I spent the ride home questioning everything that had happened. Why was I there at the same time that he was there? How did he know that I could benefit from his book about happiness? Were my guardian angels directing this event so that I could find a new path? I knew that I needed the book even before I opened it to read the forward by Norman Cousins, but the fact that I was given this book still had me floored.

I haven’t finished the book yet, but I will say this. Dr. Muller’s philosophy on life is about focusing on happiness while living with challenges, pain and fear. Everything that he has taken from his experiences brought him to where he is today, a well-respected member of the United Nations, whom earned the UNESCO Peace Education Prize in 1989. Dr. Muller’s story is an emotional and inspirational journey.

I believe opportunities present themselves in unusual ways and wanted to take this chance encounter as a sign. I began reciting the words of Dr. Coué each morning and evening. Katie and Jamie were to repeat the words daily as well.

While I may count my blessings and am aware of the importance of raising my autistic daughter to the fullest of her potential, I would be lying if I said that it’s easy. I have my days where I cry, feel overwhelmed and worried about the future. Katie can have meltdowns that drain every family member.

The importance of keeping positive pathways open in our minds is stressed in this book. Repetition of life affirming words can derail the runaway train headed for the track of helpless and hopeless thoughts. Katie’s train which races down the track of angry, anxious and depressive thoughts needs derailing and I intend to do all I can to redirect her train.

I don’t have a scientific answer for the steps that brought me to my meeting Dr. Muller and being gifted with his book, but my own faith in our guardian angels is enough for me.

I will never forget him and will forever be grateful that Kellie took me to “the best pizza in town” that day. By the way… Mesa Pizza is the best pizza in town!

Oh, and on a typically funny note… I asked my husband, “Why me? What does this mean?” To which he replied, “Maybe you looked unhappy.” Yup, that’s my guy. Fortunately he is also the wise man who said, “Never confuse pleasure with happiness.”

Destiny… my best friend, Jackie, just told me that Dr. Muller and I share the same birthday… March 11.

I never forget to laugh.

© Cassie M. Ferguson, 2009, Autism Funhouse and autismfunhouse.com. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Cassie M. Ferguson, Autism Funhouse and autismfunhouse.com, with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.